I’ve been gone for a bit. Sorry about that. The good news is our lives have calmed down and bit and I am back and ready to type! Today’s news is about eloping. This is a continuation of all the wedding planning stuff one Life, a section of our blog.
Wedding planning is hard, for some, too hard. We were planning a wedding and had the big stuff mostly picked out for free. Yet, it was still too much time/stress/other for us to handle. That’s why we canceled everything and are doing a “kind of elopement.” We’re getting married in a court house and then going to a resort where we will enjoy ourselves and take pictures (just us) in our outfits on the beach saying our vows to each other. It’s perfectly us, and while I’m sad my dad(s) will never get to walk me down the aisle, I’m happy all the other problems were solved.
Here’s a bit of info if you’ve thought about eloping yourself.
What is Eloping?
The actual definition is when you run off and get married without anyone knowing.
To me, it’s just not having a wedding. I don’t think that someone knowing makes it not an elopement. You can go to the court house, go to a beach and say vows, or do a destination wedding with just the two of you, it’s still eloping even if 100 people know about it.
That’s what we’re doing. Since we decided this half way through wedding planning, everyone that was invited to the wedding knows we are eloping, but no one is invited.
Why Would Someone Elope?
There are many reasons to elope.
- Your family isn’t helping/cooperating/caring
- You don’t want a big wedding (or one at all)
- You would rather spend the money on a trip than a wedding
- You don’t have the money for a wedding
- You don’t have anyone you want to invite to a wedding (it happens)
- You just don’t feel like planning all that
- You’re not religious
- Just because you want to, who cares why!
I’m not saying planning a wedding is hard all the time. For us, wedding planning was easy. The same is said about the cost. You should spend what you want and can, don’t let others tell you what isn’t enough or is too much, it’s about what makes you happy.
In short, people elope for many reasons, but it’s important to do it for yourself. Don’t let someone talk you into it or out of it. You should elope if you want to, no other reason.
Should You Elope?
If you’re reading this, chances are you’ve thought about eloping. I’m not going to say that you should totally do it and I’m not going to say you shouldn’t. In fact (rant), when I was thinking about eloping, I got sick of reading biased articles that I felt were trying to convince me. I wanted to read about it. That’s what this is. I promise not to try and sway you one way or the other, just present facts.
- Why are you thinking about it?
- What can be done to make the wedding you want happen?
- Do you want a wedding at all?
- What does your SO think about it?
- Do you have a place in mind?
- What have you already paid for, for the wedding?
- What you make you happy?
These are all things to think about before calling it game and eloping. Answer these questions truthfully. It might take some meditation and thinking about what really matters to you. It might take some time, but if you answer those questions with how you really feel, you will know what you need to do.
Just because you elope doesn’t mean you can’t have a reception or engagement photos or a wedding dress or vows or … you get the point.
Eloping is about you, just like a wedding. Do what you want:
- Take photos. Or don’t.
- Wear a dress. Or don’t.
- Invite just family, friends, or no one at all.
- Call it a wedding if you want.
- Be yourself and be happy.
How Does One Elope?
We are going to a court house to get married in the government’s eyes then saying our vows to each other on a beach in private (sans the photographer). Why? At the end of the day, the wedding is about us and how to feel to each other. We don’t care what a single other living soul thinks so long as we know we are being true to us. How do you want to elope?
- Go to the court house & call it a day: This is the most simple. You can get married (even religiously or in a dress) at the court house and then go to dinner in the evening. Decide on if you want to do a honeymoon or not and you’re done!
- Go to a local venue and reserve the elopement package: Many venues will have packages if the couple just wants to have a ceremony with just them (and sometimes about 5 others). You can sometimes get the cake, photographs, and dinner included too!
- Destination or Cruise: Cruises offer weddings on ship and off for eloping and groups. Resorts have the same and often times can take care of everything for one price (with many places offering meals and drinks included at the stay). You might have to pay for photos, but this way you can honeymoon and marry at the same time.
- Las Vegas: Everyone knows that eloping to Las Vegas is its own thing. With the Kiss Chapel and the drive through wedding places there are endless possibilities.
Someone to talk to:
This isn’t something you can decide on your own (it’s best to talk to SO first, haha) but you both might need an outside opinion (other than reading posts like this.) What can you do?
Talk to your best man and maid of honor, you mom(s), or your uncle that eloped. They will understand and will (hopefully) keep it a secret if you ask them to.
If you want a completely unbiased opinion from someone who doesn’t know you, contact us, we’ll do our best to give you advice and as always, send a cat pic with our reply.